Why does it seem as though rejecting Christ is easier than accepting Christ? Is it because my view is flawed? Is it because that is they way society portrays it? Is that how non Christians make it seem? Or do Christians make it seem that way?
As I was reading chapter twelve my initial reaction to the Pharisees was that it would be so much easier to just accept Jesus. Up to this point they have had so much evidence that he is the Son of God. They have seen miracle after miracle. Twice now God's voice from heaven has recognized Jesus; at his baptism and here in verse 28. But no, they'd rather look for ways to defame Jesus, to kill him, and to kill any evidence of the work he's done. This means to find a way to kill Lazarus as well. Why? Why not just accept Christ? Why not just allow yourself to believe?
Don't I do the same thing though? Don't I look for excuses not to follow Jesus and give myself completely to him? Don't I look for reasons to take my life back into my own hands? Do I not test to see if God is really there? To see if he really cares?
Why create all this extra work on myself? Why? It would be so much easier to just let go and say Jesus I trust you. I accept you and I give my life completely to you.
It seems that way would be easier. But somehow in my mind it isn't. It seems like the hardest thing I'll ever do is surrender. And maybe this is what the Pharisees thought too...I don't know. But I would rather not repeat history so even though in my mind it may seem harder in the end I know complete surrender is easier.
Jesus, I surrender my life to you; the good, the bad, and everything in between.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Sunday, April 15, 2012
John Chapter Eleven
I've been struggling a little lately. I have been trying to take time to spend with Jesus everyday but it seems like it just isn't happening. This last week or so has been incredibly busy and I just feel like I'm on the go all the time; trying to squeeze in time to eat and sleep along the way. It's as though I have no time for Jesus. How can I possibly have no time for Jesus? How can I not have time for the one who has given his life for me? How can I not possibly figure out how to make that time?
This year has been an amazing growing experience for me in my relationship with Christ. I know that I have come so far and that I am so much different than when I started out at the beginning of this school year. However, there is that tendency for things to plateau. I just get comfortable and love the ways things are and stop to seek and yearn for God. But I know that I must fight against it, it is only a temptation from the devil in which I will slowly fade away from the presence of Christ. And I know that Jesus doesn't want our relationship to stay where it is, I know he want it to grow and to continue to grow.
This is why John 11:16 sticks out to me today. As I read it I was just blown away by the thought and the words of Thomas. Jesus is talking about going to Bethany which is in Judea because of Lazarus. The last time Jesus was here the people tried to stone him. The disciples think he is crazy to go back to a place where he could potentially be killed. Yet, Thomas speaks up and says, "Let us also go, that we may die with him." Commitment.
As I reflect on the verse and on my week, I have to ask myself where is my commitment? I can't even make sacrifices in my time to spend with Jesus; let alone be willing to sacrifice my life. I want to grow, I want to be more in love with Jesus, I want him to be all I live for so that my life is of little consequence. I want to be able to join in with Thomas.
This year has been an amazing growing experience for me in my relationship with Christ. I know that I have come so far and that I am so much different than when I started out at the beginning of this school year. However, there is that tendency for things to plateau. I just get comfortable and love the ways things are and stop to seek and yearn for God. But I know that I must fight against it, it is only a temptation from the devil in which I will slowly fade away from the presence of Christ. And I know that Jesus doesn't want our relationship to stay where it is, I know he want it to grow and to continue to grow.
This is why John 11:16 sticks out to me today. As I read it I was just blown away by the thought and the words of Thomas. Jesus is talking about going to Bethany which is in Judea because of Lazarus. The last time Jesus was here the people tried to stone him. The disciples think he is crazy to go back to a place where he could potentially be killed. Yet, Thomas speaks up and says, "Let us also go, that we may die with him." Commitment.
As I reflect on the verse and on my week, I have to ask myself where is my commitment? I can't even make sacrifices in my time to spend with Jesus; let alone be willing to sacrifice my life. I want to grow, I want to be more in love with Jesus, I want him to be all I live for so that my life is of little consequence. I want to be able to join in with Thomas.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
John Chapter Ten
One of my biggest spiritual fears is that I'm going to get caught up in something that isn't true. I'm scared that when I'm standing before Jesus in the judgement day that he's going to say to me "I never knew you." The thought of it depresses me and I agonize over how can I know, how can I not be fooled by wolves in sheep's clothing.
I've really been struggling with these thoughts this week. I've had so many questions and just seemed as though there weren't any answers coming my way. I felt so close to spiraling out of control and just giving up. But Jesus had something for me this week.
After reading chapter ten in John, I am convinced that this is not to be my worry. I have to have complete faith in Christ and know that he will not allow me to be led astray. The story of The Good Shepherd was such an encouragement to me. Jesus says that his sheep will not follow a stranger. His sheep will only follow his voice. This is when it hit me. I have a father in heaven that loves me and wishes more than anything for me to be there with him. This is why being connected to Christ is so important. This is why I have to know him!
By having a connection with Christ and by knowing who he is, I will know his voice and not be led by a stranger or some strange doctrine. It's hard to let go and put complete and utter faith in Jesus but I have to. I have to let go and stop trying to control my own destiny.
"I am the good shepherd: the good shepherd giveth his life for the sheep. But he that is an hireling, and not the shepherd, whose own the sheep are not, seeth the wolf coming, and leaveth the sheep, and fleeth: and the wolf catcheth them, and scattereth the sheep."
Jesus is the Good Shepherd, not a hireling and I don't have to worry about the wolves because he will not flee , he will give his life that I may be safe! So why am I worried?
I've really been struggling with these thoughts this week. I've had so many questions and just seemed as though there weren't any answers coming my way. I felt so close to spiraling out of control and just giving up. But Jesus had something for me this week.
After reading chapter ten in John, I am convinced that this is not to be my worry. I have to have complete faith in Christ and know that he will not allow me to be led astray. The story of The Good Shepherd was such an encouragement to me. Jesus says that his sheep will not follow a stranger. His sheep will only follow his voice. This is when it hit me. I have a father in heaven that loves me and wishes more than anything for me to be there with him. This is why being connected to Christ is so important. This is why I have to know him!
By having a connection with Christ and by knowing who he is, I will know his voice and not be led by a stranger or some strange doctrine. It's hard to let go and put complete and utter faith in Jesus but I have to. I have to let go and stop trying to control my own destiny.
"I am the good shepherd: the good shepherd giveth his life for the sheep. But he that is an hireling, and not the shepherd, whose own the sheep are not, seeth the wolf coming, and leaveth the sheep, and fleeth: and the wolf catcheth them, and scattereth the sheep."
Jesus is the Good Shepherd, not a hireling and I don't have to worry about the wolves because he will not flee , he will give his life that I may be safe! So why am I worried?
Sunday, April 1, 2012
John Chapter Nine
I remember a point in my life as a Christian where I felt I had all the answers. I was so sure of where I stood on everything, I wouldn't even have to think about it. That time is far passed. As I study now, and as I seek to become closer to Jesus the less and less I know. There seems to be this great vastness that I before never knew existed. I feel as though I am groping along in the dark, spiritually blind.
The last few weeks I have really been struggling with a few questions that have started popping up around me. I don't know what I think, believe, or feel. My mind is in utter confusion and in all honesty it scares me. Is the issue really that important? What if it is? Will I choose the right belief? Is there a right belief? What if I end up on the wrong side? Is there a wrong side? These are the questions that plague me.
In John 9, Jesus says something that I believe pertains to what I am struggling with; verse 41, "Jesus said unto them, If ye were blind, ye should have no sin: but now ye say, We see: therefore your sin remaineth."
Before I felt like I had all the answers so why did I need Jesus? Now, I know that I really cannot see and so I turn to Jesus. I don't have the answers but I know he does. So I put my trust in him asking for guidance and for clarity and I know that he will not lead me astray.
"I came into the world to bring everything into the clear light of day, making all the distinctions clear, so that those who have never seen will see, and those who have made a great pretense of seeing will be exposed as blind." -John 9:39 The Message
The last few weeks I have really been struggling with a few questions that have started popping up around me. I don't know what I think, believe, or feel. My mind is in utter confusion and in all honesty it scares me. Is the issue really that important? What if it is? Will I choose the right belief? Is there a right belief? What if I end up on the wrong side? Is there a wrong side? These are the questions that plague me.
In John 9, Jesus says something that I believe pertains to what I am struggling with; verse 41, "Jesus said unto them, If ye were blind, ye should have no sin: but now ye say, We see: therefore your sin remaineth."
Before I felt like I had all the answers so why did I need Jesus? Now, I know that I really cannot see and so I turn to Jesus. I don't have the answers but I know he does. So I put my trust in him asking for guidance and for clarity and I know that he will not lead me astray.
"I came into the world to bring everything into the clear light of day, making all the distinctions clear, so that those who have never seen will see, and those who have made a great pretense of seeing will be exposed as blind." -John 9:39 The Message
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